Micromanaging is very easy to fall into as a mother.
This is something I had to come to terms with when my baby started day care or started regularly visiting family or even being left with her dad. I felt the need to explain A to Z of what she likes and how she likes it and how to do everything for her (More than just the necessary hand over stuff). After all I had spent months getting to know my baby and finding the best way to meet her needs, that’s what a large chunk of my life became about. I just got her!! 💁🏻.
I came to the realisation that by me micromanaging the needs of my daughter, I took away the power of the person I was trusting her with. I took away the power of my baby learning to express what she needs and I took away the beautiful connection that could be formed between both her and the person looking after her, that they get to create together as they learn about one another.
It was hard to let go but I practiced each time and now I see the little routines she has with different people, the new things she has tried and the new ways she gets to communicate and love and be. I see the relationships that have blossomed with our loved ones and the relationship between her and her dad. I see him confidently leading her being an amazing father and it was me letting go that really showed the trust I had in him to be the best dad he can.
Sometimes you just have to trust everything will be ok because having to let go as a mother is sooo tough but you teach your little people independence and show them that you trust in them and that they can trust in themselves. – Of course it’s also vital that you know that the people you leave your children with have the child’s best interests and well being at hear.
But knowing that my baby will be ok if I couldn’t be around for some time just makes my heart at peace. I know that every moment away a little piece of us is missing as a mother but we do it for them and we do it for us, so we both get to grow and learn how to be in new ways because that’s what life is about.
So if you are feeling uneasy about letting go and putting your child into someone else’s hands, I get it! It’s extremely difficult. But I encourage you to remember that when it comes to our precious little ones we at times get to learn that a decision needs to be about them, we learn to put our fears aside for the long term growth and well-being of our little ones. And that’s the art of letting go and trusting in the good of the universe. Something I think will never be easy and will always be something to check in with for yourself.
It all comes down to the question “Is this decision being made from a place of love or fear?”
If you are looking for some support around learning to let go a little more in your life as a mum. Contact me and I’d be happy to help 🙏🏼💕